For those companies that truly believe they are the….pentagon, get over it. When security is so tight that it renders you helpless with any tiny misstep, like leaving your key fob on your desk when you head out on a dealer visit, please stop it. We’re working here. To those companies that believe that outsourcing will give you the same level of service and understanding, start them in the field… To those companies that believe that everyone is tech savvy remember you have a few technosauruses left.

Call the help desk, forgot my key fob, can you help? Of course, I’m going to say the fob is lost and issue you a temporary blah blah number. Great. And….I’m going to send you the next ten so you can continue during the day (customer service added value I think to myself). When you get home call back and we’ll say the fob was found. Perfect.

Except. The temporary number didn’t work. I wasn’t able to open the list they sent on my phone. Luckily we could work in the dealer’s system and I could answer email on my phone.  Get home, call in and say “fob found”. Oh good they say and set me up again. Now I might not be tech savvy but common sense I got. Please stay on the line while I try it I say…..you guessed it, it doesn’t work. Moment please, tapping in the back ground and come to find out my fob isn’t live on the server, whatever the hell that means. Ok make it live. We will have to refer the ticket to that group. What group? “That group”. Ok but I need to work here…just sayin. Yes Miss Sandi we understand, doubtful I think.

Fast forward to this morning. Apparently “that group” was very accommodating emailing me instructions on how to reset, restore, re-something my fob. Trouble is I can’t read it on my phone so I send it to my home email (probably an enormous violation of pentagon security) where I can read it on my iPad. Go to blah blah blah.muc seriously that’s in another country but I try it and guess what… I can’t get in. Perhaps if I go to the office, no, I’m not doing that nothing gets done there and I’ve got serious stuff to actually do. I call back and “explain” my situation and they will do what they can. No, in my best do not F with me calm voice, I don’t want instructions I want you to do what you do on your server and let me know when I’m up and running. Here’s my cell number let me know when it’s done.

I hang up…and go to a Zumba class.

I know… but I went anyway. So for one hour I went and got my ass kicked by a little dynamo that likes to think she’s letting us work to our own level all the while giving you the stink eye if you’re not.  One hour of the best selection of Latin inspired salsa hip hop samba merengue music. I sweat my ass off, you would think I no long have an ass but I assure you, and for all the boxing segments I had visions of “that group” and help desk personnel. Completely spent I got home, showered, made a delicious cup of coffee and tried again.

It worked. I worked. No one got hurt. Thank you Missy.