Category Archives: Pause Points

Ordinary legacy moments in time.

And It Makes Me Wonder

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Doesn’t it make you wonder when you come across something like this carved into a tree?  Around the bend, in a bit from the road, someone many years ago thought it was important to memorialize their…what?  Their being there together, their love, the date?

Doesn’t it make you wonder what ever happened to Angel and Francie?  Are they still together, do they ever come back here, does anyone else (besides nosey me) know about this?

Doesn’t it ever make you wonder what the story is?  Would you consider making one up?  Would you consider ever trying to find them, do you think someone else is trying to find them?

I’ve taken to walking again and while I find walking in nature therapeutic I really found this interesting.  I spent the good portion of an hour thinking about Angel and Francie and where they might be today. Are they happy?  Did they make it? Or did they change the road they were on?

And it makes me wonder…

Yes there are two paths you can go by but in the long run..

There’s still time to change the road you’re on.

And then that song took over (you’re welcome) and Angel and Francie were gone for a while. But I came back to them because if someone is going to take the time to carve something into a tree it should be worth the wonder.

 

Spending the Day

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There are days, no matter how hard you try to avoid them will remind you that life is short.  Those days are usually wrapped up in anniversaries that are so incredibly painful that you drag yourself from bed kicking and screaming only to return to it two or three times.  It takes a few tries to see through the veil of tears to get your face washed and your teeth brushed, make up is not an option.

There are rituals involved and as comforting as they may be sometimes only the ordinary can ease you through.

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Turkey and Swiss on a toasted bagel and a tiny bag of chips.  The smell of toast is nostalgic but comforting in a school-day-breakfast sort of way.

Not running out of gas, animated conversation, good parking karma and an excursion to the hardware store to gather paint chips.

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Buying mums and pumpkins and gourds oh my.  The kids at the petting zoo, you at the petting zoo. The beauty of the day and the time of year.  The crisp air and the warm sun. It’s the “change” time of year with nature giving you permission to let go as it is letting go too.

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spending-the-day003The wave of kids, dozens and dozens of them piling out of school.  The laughing, the yelling, the kinetics, the colors and the music.  All vaguely familiar from long ago.

A fresh cider doughnut and more conversation.

A glass of red and dinner in the merriment of the local pub.  You’re still reminded but the ordinary life around you becomes a salve. An exhale, the day is over and the ordinary has done its job getting you from beginning to end. That and the love of friends, and family and dogs and life.

Ordinary Legacy Moment: Eagle Scout Project

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curiousCuriosity leads to ordinary legacy moments, make no mistake about it.  When something catches my eye, even in the midst of garage sale goings-on, I’ve got to take a look.

What a moment I stumbled upon.  Picture this, it’s 86 degrees around noon on the day of my cousin’s garage sale.  We are scrambling to put up a tent for cover from the sun and I see this van stop up at the corner.  Some kids jump out, and get to work?  On what?  By the time the tent is up, I’ve missed it.

But looking down the other side of the street there they are again.  Ok, I’m curious (otherwise known as nosey, I get it) because they are all crouched down on the screaming hot pavement painting a Maltese cross on the black top.  Did I mention it’s 86 degrees?  Probably 155 on the street…ok I exaggerate but it was damn hot.

Can I ask what you’re doing?  Sure, says Daniel Buda, it’s my Eagle Scout Project.  We’re painting a Maltese cross on the pavement in front of every fire hydrant in Dumont (NJ) so that in inclement weather our fire fighters can recognize the hydrant location.  If a hydrant isn’t shoveled out in winter, chances are the cross on the pavement will be seen after the snow’s been plowed.

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And there you have it, Daniel Buda of Scout Troop 1345 (Dumont/Bergenfield NJ) and his friends Sean Adomilli, Naomi Castaneda, Kendra Chaiken, Kyle Villareal and Eric D’Anna were going from hydrant to hydrant on one of the hottest summer days to insure that the firefighters of their town could do their job most efficiently…say what you want about the youth of today, these are the kids who are already ordinary legacies in the making. They were off again in a matter of minutes, on to the next location, being led by Daniel and shuttled by two wonderful gentlemen volunteers, I regret I didn’t get their names.

Later in the day when I was done with my garage sale shift I met the man who’s house was behind the hydrant, he hadn’t been home when the kids did their thing.  We had a great conversation about how cool it was and he told me that he’s lived in this house his whole life, I estimate his age at around 85, and his father was once the Fire Chief in town.  What a moment, what a good bunch of kids.

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Made my day then, even more coincidentally I couldn’t help noticing all the Maltese crosses I passed on my way to Gramma’s today.  That is an ordinary legacy moment relived.  Thank you Daniel and company for a job well done. Let us know when you make Eagle Scout.

 

August was…

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August was

Bee-like.  Busy in a laid back sweltering way, creatively productive, sweet in its return on courage manifested and hopeful.  I had the opportunity to take part in August Break 2016 on Instagram.  Using the thoughtful prompts from Susannah Conway I thoroughly enjoyed each day of capturing my ordinary take on the subject and sharing among her many followers.  Making space on her site for us to share our blogs shows the true measure of her generosity.  Not only am I grateful but I’ve taken away many a lesson.

One of the prompts was “handwriting”. Of course it came at the exact moment I was trying to figure out where to start my summer work:

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It was my intention to use my down time to launch the Elder Beauty Project instead I’ve scraped it.  As a project, I’ve scrapped it as a project because the real project is and always has been Ordinary Legacy. Thank you David for reminding me of that and now I see it again.

The fact that I’m tired of talking about myself remains.  While this has been the outcome of my summer work, the month long journey to get there has been amazing.  After a somewhat delayed start, read procrastinated for weeks, I worked up my courage to send an email to the director of the Mahwah Senior Center, Susanne Small, telling her about what I do and how I’d love to do it.  She loved the idea, with enthusiasm and more generosity I was invited to the center to share my vision.  I was also invited to speak with several of the seniors about my vision.  While they are a bit curious, I’ll need to come back with a bit more for them.  Suffice to say you’ll be seeing more of this:

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Susanne has graciously offered to work with me to develop the questions most likely to yield the result I’m looking for, she knows our seniors and what makes them open up.  I’ll be able to leave brochures for them to consider working with me sharing bits of the ordinary that make their lives distinct.  That got me investigating and developing a concept brochure.

Which in turn led to Bergen County Camera, where collectively they know everything, to look for a new lens for my DSLR.  I mean they know everything so showing them what I do now and how I want to tweak it took a bit more courage.  They didn’t flinch at my work, thank God. It always helps to lead with the fact that you understand full well that you are an accidental photographer… I have a new lens, which I like but the jury’s still out on whether or not it will perform the magic I require.  What? I’m practicing and keeping an open mind, I mean believing in my talent…like I always say, you shoot enough you’re bound to hit something.

True to form once you allow yourself to see it, you will see it everywhere.  Like here:

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And here:

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And here:

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These are the stories, the ordinary legacy stories that have been right under my nose while I was too busy being all about me.  Not very Jeanette-like as it turns out.

So going forward Ordinary Legacy will continue to be about preserving the ordinary stories that are all around, hopefully full of senior insight, definitely traditional recipes that may be lost, collections and oh those amazing ordinary legacy moments in time.

I can’t let go of the Heartlines series I just started because it’s been so well received.  If you haven’t seen them yet, they are heart shaped letters to a specific someone but not addressed to them.  They tackle that someone’s current situation/dilemma/angst/ without mentioning their name.  In the end there are always several people who would swear that the Heartline is meant for them.  The beauty of us all being in the same boat as it turns out.

For me September has always been the beginning of the New Year.  I don’t do resolutions but I can see this year I’m headed away from Facebook, because their algorithms are becoming a pain in the ass, and leaning toward and loving Instagram where images=stories, duhhh.  I’m glad to be back, renewed and ready to keep allowing myself to see all those ordinary stories I’ve been overlooking.  Hope you’ll stay tuned and join forces along with me.

Summer Work

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Unless something incredibly amazing happens during August, we’re taking the month off from blogging. I’ve been trying to launch the Elder Beauty Project and it just hasn’t happened.  Why? Beats the stuffing out of me… Fear? Well yeah, there’s always that. Not knowing where to begin?  Absolutely.

What if?  I’ve been through enough what ifs to last a lifetime and haven’t come up with a decent answer yet. So now is the time to start asking for help.  Did I say that out loud?  Yes, yes I did.  There are brilliant people in my circles that would be more than willing to tell me how to get started, stay motivated, shut up about the what ifs and on and on. Why the hell do I think I always have to reinvent the wheel?  On my own? You know why…

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I believe in this project so what’s the holdup.   I envision it to be a cross between Humans of New York and On the Road with Steve Hartman with a culinary twist.  Make sense?  Fine, you’ll see, it will look a lot like this; one of the most satisfying days of my life on a creative level, culinary level and humanistic level.  I will never forget it and crave so many more of them.

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So I’m going to channel my inner Jeanette (in whose honor I dedicate the project) and get off my ass and talk to people about their people or other people’s people and get this thing going. The overriding fear of these stories not being told should surpass the fear of getting started.  You can get involved, you know, at the Elder Beauty Project. Just sayin.

I’m also going to take part in the August Break 2016 with the incredible Susannah Conway, to make sure my brain doesn’t completely explode, along with a host of other incredible bloggers and creative souls and just plain humans.  Look for the Ordinary Legacy images on Instagram #augustbreak2016

See you in September, when the summer’s through…with a plan, renewed enthusiasm and all the courage I can muster. Can’t wait.