Superpowers

DSC_3352

Usually a Superpower refers to a state that has a dominant position in international relations and is characterized by its unparalleled ability to exert influence or project power on a global scale. Thank you once again Wikipedia. But there is an emerging, at least in my little universe, group of women that are bantering the term about regularly. These women are a decade…eh hem or more…younger than I but I love the way they think.

Andrea Scher, Karen Walrond, Brene Brown, Elizabeth Gilbert: You have superpowers! they say.

Yes, I do. Apparently I’ve been developing and honing them for years. But I’ve never referred to them as such, it would never occur to me to refer to them as such because…who the hell knows why. Here’s how I see it:

Writing. In a straight forward, tell me what you want to say and I’ll help you say it way. Bring me your voice and your thoughts and I’ll translate for you. I can do that.

Listening. Tell me your story, tell me your pain, tell me your troubles, tell me your predicament, God forbid you tell me your joy. People talk to me, not just my people but a lot of people. Total strangers on a line somewhere who are uncomfortable will talk to me. Any one in any situation will gravitate to me and begin a conversation. Kids will talk to me even dogs will talk to me. It’s the face my best friend keeps telling me.

Exhaling. After hearing and translating and offering I have finally learned that my job is not to fix. My job, the reason I’m here, what I can do, is give. And then exhale. Do NOT make the offer, do NOT volunteer, do NOT deprive yet another individual of the satisfaction of bringing themselves into their own. Even if that means falling down, come to find out the getting up is the reward, the character builder, the friend of resourcefulness.   This superpower was hard earned and it’s still in its initial stages but oh it is going to be big big big.

Process. It’s that interesting balance of common sense, pragmatism and foresight that somehow eludes others. Here’s the secret, it’s not a superpower it’s the ability to look one minute, I mean just one minute, beyond what YOU are doing. If you can master that you will see how, wait for it, others are being effected. A smooth process is about flow, knowing where the flow is being crimped makes you a superhero. There you go, please, get started on this one yourself.

Today is Mother’s Day and usually I struggle through this holiday as a Father’s Daughter. My sister and I spend every Sunday morning with our Mother so to gain perspective in this struggle I came to the conclusion that every Sunday is Mother’s Day but today had cards, and hot bakery rolls and my best behavior. The live and let live, let it go already superpower is still a work in progress. I’m hoping once you recognize a superpower it’s much easier to develop.

I know like I know that these women are on to something when they profess that we all have superpowers. But it’s not about bending steel with your bear hands or xray vision.  As Superheroes themselves, they possess that most invaluable superpower of them all; generosity.

 

 

A Lifelong Learner the Hard Way

sliky1-300x200

The hard way isn’t necessarily a bad thing.  In my family it’s known as slinky syndrome.  I was that kid that had to see how the slinky worked. Have you ever tried to figure out how a slinky works, it’s not pretty you’ll need another one after you make a mess.  But the clue in the mess comes down to curiosity.  I believe it’s one of the most important characteristics of a lifelong learner.  We are curious, we want to know, we want books around us, we trade in preconceived notions, we start things, and we fail.  Himself used to tell me I never had enough input.  He used to chant it sometimes when I would be stuck in a book, more input more input.  I’m ok with that but books aren’t the only place I learn.

My senior year in high school I was working full time.  My classes ended at 11am and I was in work from noon until eight at night.  I was a teller at a bank, making good money and after graduation when some were going off to college I was working.  It was a different time, a high school diploma meant something more then.

Unfortunately the bank and I parted ways and I found myself on unemployment.  Yet another learning experience but I used the time to go to secretarial school through the state.  Typing and steno opened up a whole new world for me, I know steno doesn’t exist anymore but it was a life saver.  Every secretarial position I took became a treasure trove of new ideas, new business experiences, I became a sponge.  The funny thing about a sponge is its capacity is limited it can’t continue to hold  it all.

I became practiced at the art of purging.  This is yet another characteristic of a lifelong learner. We can let go of stale information, we can embrace technology, we can create new paths, and we can defy convention if only in small ways.

I did eventually go to college inspired by a man I worked with.  His name is Rawleigh Tremain and he is that wonderful blend of intelligence, good humor and generosity.  Never once with my lack of formal education did he ever make me feel less.  He inspired me to want to know what he knew.  Several years ago I was able to reconnect with him through the power of technology.  He remains on the periphery of my life and I remain ever grateful.  I have my bachelor’s and master’s degrees and couldn’t be more proud of having graduated with honors in my forties.

Lately, I’ve been chasing more creative learning.  I’ve always known that I am a right brained person but over the years I never found the right combination for a creative life.  I think I’m a rare bird that has too much linear thinking combined with lack of bohemian temperament.  My talents lie in process and development…duh… the ability to see things that others can’t, the solution being blatantly obvious is a creative talent.  Fine but I’ve always wanted to be an artist.

I’ve had my camera for a long time.  I’ve been good at it and I’ve gotten tired of it.  Finally I put it down when life got in the way.  So when life gets in the way I go to plan B.  The thing about plan B is if you choose it yourself rather than have it forced on you it’s encouraging, and stimulating, and inspirational.  Plan B put me on Stowe Lane, prompted me to begin my blog, I am in learning overload again.  I believe creativity has found me.  I believe this because my friend David let me know that he was glad I was taking on this project.  Project.  That is the catch phrase of all those wonderfully creative people out there making their personal form of art.  That affirmation will sustain me indefinitely and I am grateful that amazingly creative David bestowed it on me.

I’ve picked up my camera again with the help of Andrea Scher of Super Hero Life and Seth Casteel of Underwater Dogs fame.  I am learning from their unconventional approach to life and teaching.  My courses are online, shared with others through forums, and left to their generous critiques.  There are seminars shared with like-minded people.  There are morning coffee and learn sessions at local retailers.  All these new ways of learning and connecting are creatively assembled by a battalion of young and fresh and generous minds.

Being a lifelong learner means making education a priority.  Lifelong insinuates that it is ongoing, for that you’ve got to be motivated, self-motivated, and you’ve got to use what you learn or purge it.  Surround yourself with the tools of learning, books, people, technology, vision, and curiosity.  Make it habitual, become addicted to it and share what you’ve learned and the excitement it brings you.  With all the new research on brain functioning and longevity the chances are you won’t be alone in your pursuit.

 

Just an FYI, “a lifelong learner the hard way”  is my story in six words.  The six word memoir project was launched by Smith Magazine in 2005??, maybe?  Not important, what is important is they believe everyone has a story and the six word project has morphed into a phenomenon.  I could read them all day, some of them are poignant, some hilarious, some heartbreaking kind of like PostSecret without the post cards but that will be another post for another time.

http://www.smithmag.net/sixwords/

Check it out, write your own memoir in six words.  I guarantee you’ll find it interesting, difficult and enlightening.

Capture Life

cottage 960 capture life

Photo credit: Maureen Nichols, Cottage 960

Is it that you don’t know how things work for me?  Picture this (pun intended)…I’ve got a great camera, Nikon, I’ve got perspective, someone once told me, and I’m not using it.  Why the hell not?  Who the hell knows?  I believe, no, I know like I know that it’s the getting started that’s got me.  So….I put it out there and it’s just amazing what happens.

Maureen at Cottage960 (www.cottage960.com ) puts a really cool new pendant on her FB page of a woman in a beautiful 1940’s era suit, that alone was right up my alley, snapping a picture with her brownie camera.  On the back it says, “Capture Life”.  You know I own it now, right?  When I take the girls to get groomed the cashier says to me, “So when you capture life, what are you going to do with it?”  Here I am back at who the hell knows.

Then I get an email from a blog I follow called Super Hero Life (www.superherolife.com )   Subject:  Sad bananas and finding our joy again.  Ok, I’m listening.  Andrea Scher, creative force behind Super Hero Life is sponsoring a Treasure Hunt course starting May 1st.  For a small fee (from the email):

  • A creative photo prompt each day in your inbox
  • Photo tips + creative musings to inspire your work
  • A warm, encouraging community space on Flickr to share your work and support your fellow treasure seekers!

Come on that’s perfect and I am in.  I’m all about sparking creative juices.  So I’m signed up and looking forward to getting back into my camera and my perspective.

Then, I’m reading something on Upworthy.com and there’s a tiny little glimpse of an ad for this movement, seminar, thing called One Picture Saves a Life.  You can sign up for a seminar at St. Hubert’s Animal Welfare Complex (www.sthuberts.org ) to learn how you can become a volunteer to photograph shelter dogs to bring them closer to adoption.  Send an email and if there’s room, first come first served, you’re in…for free…being taught by Seth Casteel (www.littlefriendsphoto.com ) of Underwater Dogs fame.  You know I sent the email, you know I got invited.

So Saturday morning I take a ride to Madison NJ to St. Hubert’s and participate in this seminar that blew me away.  Go to www.onepicturesaves.com to get the full story.  Suffice to say Seth Casteel is an awesome dude, and all of you know I never use the word dude. Generous with his knowledge, he (along with Petfinder, Greater Good, the Animal Rescue Site, and John Paul Pet) put this program together down to the last detail.  He even tells you what lens you need, camera settings, best backgrounds, shelters looking for volunteers.  I tell you I am stoked about this….who better than me, one part of Two Aunts and a Chevy fame to take this on.  It was a great way to spend a Saturday morning, learning with like-minded people, about how to help shelter dogs when you’re condo association says you can only have a minimum of two dogs.  I hope the other half of the Two Aunts and a Chevy is listening…just saying Toots you hated Chevy’s picture too.  But I digress.

The thing is I don’t have the lens, 50mm straight, and you know I looked on line and they cost a small fortune.  So I think let me go down to Bergen County Camera ( www.bergencountycamera.com ) and just look,  yeah right.  Do you know what downtown Westwood, NJ is like on a Saturday afternoon? It’s sunny and perfect for a day in one of the best downtowns around so it’s jammin.  Oh come on, you know I got a parking space, you know there was an hour left on the meter and you know like you know that BCC had a used 50mm for $79.00.  Of course they did, my sister is saying as she reads this.

My two most willing (not really) subjects (victims) Toto and Lina are being snapped a frame a second. They are giving me the Moooooooom look.  They are taking themselves to bed and having no more of it.  Not to worry I will find other willing (maybe) subjects to snap.  I know like I know that as Karma would have it anything animal related, carried out for their greater good, will only serve to increase your personal Karmic equity.  I will be golden my friends…