I’m Back

Lenovo

Back and Macless but not without a story…you’re shocked I know.  There is a reason why my adventure into the world of Mac didn’t work out, not just because some people are Mac people and some people aren’t.  Even though I had a Mac Guru there was a reason why he was unable to assist due to family and work constraints.  You’ve heard me say it before if it’s not a blessing it’s a lesson.

The Mac went back and I began the hunt for another laptop, windows based, light weight, beautiful grahics blah blah blah.  If you type those characteristics into google several brands come up.  Now I start asking around and see who’s using what beyond Mac.  Then I ask a friend…one of my former employees from a thousand years ago works for Lenovo…what do you suggest?  Several instant messages later not only does she confirm my recent research she assists in the sale…it was a lovely and generous assist but for me her reasoning was the most heartwarming thing I’ve heard in a very long time.  Ghandi said you may never know what effect you have in the world but if you do nothing there will be nothing.  Apparently I did something for her many many years ago that I had no knowledge of, I was doing my best as her manager and she never forgot me and felt I did more than my best. I have watched her become a woman of substance, a loving mother and beautiful soul over the last several years and my heart bursts for her with every new and exciting life hurdle she overcomes.  I could not have been more flattered or humbled by her loving words and generosity.  This is why the Mac didn’t work out.

It also didn’t work out because I chose it for all the wrong reasons.  Initially when my laptop died I first asked all the creative people I know and they unequivocally said they use Mac…so that’s what thought I had to do too.  The thing is it doesn’t make me less creative if I don’t use a Mac, doesn’t make them more creative because they do…I was trying to follow something that I wasn’t, I was negating all the expertise, experience and background I had in Windows for something I thought I should be using if I wanted to be considered creative.  The medium you use does not determine your level of creativity…ever. I will never again discount my experience, expertise or hard earned background to follow a crowd. Lesson learned.  By the way, all of that expertise and experience is the reason why so many people find it difficult to assimilate to Mac, it gets in the way.  I’ve been saying intuitive my ass for that very reason.  The youngest of the young can open the box and begin using those products mainly because they lack context, for them lack of context equals intuitiveness.   Ok, I’m done with that now…maybe.

Now my laptop is ordered complete with all the bells and whistles, my preferred software and the wait begins.  Now mind you I don’t have a laptop………what I do have is a camera full of images, 40gbs to be exact, and nowhere to do my work.  Here’s another reason why this happened, I’ve learned to value my work.  My work, not the job I do each day that pays the mortgage, my work.  My words and images and thoughts and observations and tastes and smells and recognitions and on and on.  My work. I missed my work.  I found myself wallowing in several different unproductive waist high marshes of boredom and television watching.   Until I had to travel for a few different reasons and downloaded some very pivotal audio books. Bless you Brene’ Brown and Marie Kondo for putting your work out in the world for me to grab on to and go.

You all know I can fill a construction grade big green garbage bag but putting your house in order according to Marie Kondo takes it to a whole new level.  The amount of nostalgic hold me backs that went in the trash or got donated lifted a weight I never even knew I was carrying.  Not done yet but the really hard stuff is going to require supervision…just sayin.

Finally my laptop is making its way from Shanghai, probably from the plant next door to Apple (but I digress) and should arrive on Monday 10-5-15.  The thing is it arrived early, does that ever happen (do not roll your eyes), on Friday 10-2-15 after I’m visiting my mother for her care update meeting I come home to the notice on the door that says we’ll be back on Monday.  Oh no you won’t………………I call UPS and beg them to get a hold of the driver, he’s out of the area already. Really?  The notice on the door was delivered 20 minutes ago.  Ok, yes hold it at the Customer Center and I’ll pick it up tonight.  What time?  Between 8-9pm.  Well I thought why not go down there early, bat my eyelashes use my best can ya help a sistah out routine and see what happens.  Here’s the thing, there is no one there UNTIL 8pm.   I drove down there in the pouring rain during rush hour to try and work a thing, lesson learned.

What the hell am I going to do for an hour and a half?  There is a huge mall a few miles from the UPS Center and I make my way over there, chiding myself the whole way about thinking I’ll get in and get out of there with my laptop under my arm, and find myself in the parking lot near Lord and Taylor when someone pulls out of a first row, six spaces in parking place….best parking karma ever.  Again, do NOT roll your eyes.

As I get out of the car I notice my phone is about to die…I plug it in and go.  No phone, no contact, just me soaking wet headed into the mall.  I walk through Lord and Taylor and beyond the mall side entrance is an oasis called…wait for it…Aroma Espresso Bar. Behind the counter is Lamar, who asks how I’m doing and takes my order.  I know what I looked like, a nearly drowned rat with a bit of the shivers, so Lamar assured me he’d make everything piping hot.  Amen.  There are no pictures with this post because my phone was left in the car but Lamar set the most beautiful tray in front me complete with croissant, a chocolate, and napkins.  My latte had a gorgeous foam art heart that instantly warmed me.  I couldn’t thank this young man enough.

And so I sat people watching, writing in the journal I always have with me and sipping my latte.  The heart never lost its shape, with each sip I took a bit went down my throat but it always kept its shape and there’s the lesson, if you work from your heart it will always keep its shape….I have been working from my heart all day with my new laptop, blessing the people who helped get me through to this day Muriel, Linda, Anthony and Lamar, and utterly enjoying my work.  Amen

 

 

And Good Conversation

 

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The great gift of conversation lies less in displaying it ourselves than in drawing it out of others. He who leaves your company pleased with himself and his own cleverness is perfectly well pleased with you. Jean de la Bruyere 

 One of my best legacy lessons is to be someone’s first call.  I was someone’s first call this week and it was joyous.  When someone dear to you has had a fine day doing something new in a place that will soon be called home and they call to tell you all about it you have entered a special place in their heart.  When only you would understand the joy they feel riding home in the dark after a day filled with new people and places you have met them where they are.  When there is more listening than talking on your part, when the laughter and tears fill the same conversation, when everyone hangs up feeling heard new roads have been traveled together. When you can’t stop smiling hours after the conversation ends you know like you know that forever is now.

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I was someone else’s first call after arriving home from some very long and wonderful travel.  Meet we must in our usual place the sooner the better. And so we did among the lunch crowd, minus our usual server in a crowded neighborhood pub. Catching up on the fun and laments of the months we’d been apart, laughing and concerned, a tear or two, many more laughs and quips and hugs later we take a breath and notice there is no one left in the place.  Such is the joy of being together.

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Someone’s first call of the morning; you in today? On my way in now.  Then it will be worth it for me to come down.  Every once in a while you meet a new old friend.  Someone that has traveled your road walked your walk and thinks your think…even though you just met.  They have some of what you don’t and you have something too and you pick up where you left off even though you’ve just begun.  You love their family and they know what you’re thinking from the words you’ve written.  It’s glorious and seldom that this comes along.  It is a blessing full of exchanging ideas and ideology and technical blah blah that you would never ask anyone else for fear of being….something.

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Someone’s first call to someone else can be a delight for you as well.  Long overdue we meet at another usual place midway between three here and theres. My Sister’s boy is her light at any moment he is near her.  He is precious in his sweetness and love for her.  He is spoiled because he is such a wonderful about to be teenager with none of the manic depressive drama to be seen…yet. We three adults share a bond that can never be broken, made of unspoken words, sleeping on the floor and just being within whisper range of each other at the lowest point of our lives to date. Those days behind us we revel in our time around the table and in this child.  He is a nonstop delight and can talk to his Aunt incessantly.  Aunt Terri remember when…Aunt Terri remember…Aunt Terri yeah I like rap…such and such and Lil Wayne,  whatever happened to Lil Wayne…how could we not laugh and delight in this wonderful kid who just asked his 52 year old Aunt, who’s only knowledge of rap is on a door, whatever happen to Lil Wayne.  And so the night went with its constant stream of Aunt Terri’s, a new menu that caused all the food to be late, an amazing and funny server who kept everyone from being hangry…a night to remember because of course we all smiled all the way home.

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These weren’t just conversations they were inscriptions on our hearts.  Warmth and sharing and oh yeah there were words too.  One of Yogi Berra’s nuggets of wisdom, “It was impossible to get a conversation going, everybody was talking too much” might have rung true this week were it not for the satisfaction had by all.  Everyone was completely pleased with our cleverness and each other. It was conversational perfection because we talked in present tenses.