Tag Archives: relevance

What’s Next?

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There probably comes a time in every career when you begin to think, what’s next?  For those starting out, it’s a matter of; is this working for me?-do I like this job?-am I bored?-or I can do better?  For those of us beginning to wrap up it’s a matter of relevance and retirement.  The big R & R.

Many of those in the middle aren’t even thinking about it, somewhat afraid to tempt fate.

Something happens to start the process, for those starting out it’s a matter of money-status-deserving-entitlement!  For those of us wrapping up it can be something along the lines of technology.  Technology rushing ahead of us with the force of its fury sneaking up behind us to bite us in the ass. Or…you can find yourself in the unusual position of being one of a select few who actually know something others don’t.

About what?  A rickety old mainframe system, once state of the art I’m sure, that now needs to be upgraded to interface with the real world. The app world.  The world that includes code and mapping and URLs, that world.

I recently found myself in that position and I’m not sure how I feel about it.  On one hand I feel like a dinosaur about to take the plunge into extinction and on the other hand I feel like a dinosaur being resurrected from a company archeological dig.  You notice either way I remain a dinosaur.

Regardless of how I felt about it I found myself, along with one other colleague of the same status, awake at 6am and at the ready to test the newest upgrade of the poor old mainframe system.  We came to the conclusion that the last time we heard each other’s voices, this time over Skype, was the last time this function got a facelift.

The test failed at 630am and there was much discussion of what went right and what went wrong, most of which escaped me.  Fast forward several hours later and phase one of the testing had been completed successfully.

These are the things that get me thinking, wouldn’t it be better to think of yourself as a well-regarded “company historian” than a dinosaur?  Didn’t it prove better to take a preexisting system with good bones, that has served you well, remains relevant and important and upgrade it?

Could one make the leap that in our throwaway society, where spikey hair and skinny jeans reign, sometimes the lessons and knowledge of the past also serve you well and remain not only relevant but incredibly important?  If only to prevent you from trying to reinvent the wheel?

Perhaps this is what’s next; a renewed respect for the company elders. Perhaps…or more likely, since the last known existing old mainframe system has been upgraded, a bit of R & R is in order.

 

Poppycosh

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A crisis of relevance??????? Poppycosh she said!

Poppycosh is one of those words.  You know the one’s that joyfully roll off the tongue (like spatula) and make you wrinkle your nose (like balaclava) and chuckle just a little. Poppycosh??????? Then I say, makes me want to write a whole post on Poppycosh.

Turns out you really can’t write a whole post on poppycosh (now downgraded to all lower case) because basically it’s chicken and dumplings with paprika.  And I think we’re even saying it wrong. Isn’t it supposed to be Paprikash?

It sounds like one of those words my mother-in-law would use.  I’m thinking of her today as I’m writing this as it’s her birthday.  She would have been 92 if she were still with us.  If she were still with us would I be where I am…let’s not go there. She was a love but she had a few words she used for things that…I’m not sure were words. Or they were some mash up of Polish and something. But I digress.

Anyway, Urban Dictionary defines poppycosh as a random shout of joy.  Like actually shouting the word poppycosh, I don’t think so.  Is that what they do at Urban Dictionary?

So far my best research on the word brought me here:

So I think what my summer sister was trying to tell me was:

pop·py·cock
ˈpäpēˌkäk/
noun

informal
  1. nonsense.
    synonyms: nonsense, rubbish, claptrap, balderdash, blather, moonshine, garbage;

    informalrot, tripe, jive, hogwash, baloney, drivel, bilge, bunk, eyewash, piffle, phooey, twaddle;
    informalbushwa, malarkey, gobbledygook, mumbo jumbo;
    informal,bunkum, tommyrot;
    vulgar slangcrapola, verbal diarrhea
    “their claims are poppycock”

In other words, bullshit…

While I love the plethora of synonyms for poppycock, bullshit seems to be the one that I can most get my head around.  What the hell does that say about me?

It says a lot actually.  In the scheme of evaluating one’s relevance (which is where this whole thing started) are we really just bullshitting ourselves?  Is it up to us to decide where we fall on the relevance scale or does each person we interact with have the honor of deciding that for themselves?  As Wayne Dyer says, what other people think of us is none of our business.  With that in mind, and with my mantra of living my life the way I want my story told in tow, I’m butting out of the relevance thing.

I’m pretty sure you’ll decide.  POPPYCOSH!!!!! she shouted with joy…

How Would You Know?

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Memorial Day 2016001

As is so often the case, people will come and go from your life. Especially on this weekend I think of many of those people. I don’t have war dead but my heart breaks for those who do. What I do have is gratitude for their sacrifice and I find myself taking moments here and there over the weekend to pray for them and theirs.

While this weekend is about honoring those lost in sacrifice to our country I can’t help but honor one lost too soon. I tend to question why sometimes but I could almost hear him answer with another question, “how would you know?”. That question was the answer to many a question over the years. I hadn’t thought of him saying that for quite some time.

I was reminded of that question, while watching Grace and Frankie of all things. That question and the concept of relevance. “Am I relevant”, asked Grace and all I could hear in my head was, “how would you know”?

Every person who sacrificed their life for our country became instantly relevant. Not only to those left behind but also to those who live in freedom because of them. A person who lives an ordinary life becomes relevant to those they leave behind also but “how would you know” if you’re relevant among the living?

The fact is you won’t know unless the living say and do something to assure you that you are, indeed, relevant. I believe in that whole heartedly and hope I’m doing enough of that. There is a song about if I die young bury me in satin, lay me down on a bed of roses, sink me in a river at dawn, send me away with the words of a love song. While that die young ship has sailed for me every time I hear that song I think DON’T DO THAT. Don’t come and say and do when I die, come now, say now, do now and think of me now so I know like I know that relevance is real and I am it. I will do the same for you, that’s “how we’d know”.

Many minds will wander this weekend to people who have come and gone from this life and I urge you to have your moments, like at the sound of taps.  But I also urge you to stay among the living where you can be comforted and assured of your relevance and you can do the same in return.

To Prove or Add Value

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I’m fond of saying I have nothing left to prove only value to add.  This week I find myself asking, what the hell does that mean?  Do your values determine your life or does your life determine your values?  Yes.  At what point in your life are you done trying to prove yourself to anyone other than yourself?  When adding value do you discern?  Do you need to know the definition of value in order to add it?

Two things happened this week to make me question if this is the way I should be putting the whole prove vs value thing out there.  Someone commented on the blog last week that they too (on their 65th birthday) felt they had much value still to add.  Then in an episode of “Chopped” a 64 year old woman struggled against the younger chefs to prove she is still capable of adding value.  She ultimately won.   Does that mean you’ll always have something to prove?  These two people want to prove to themselves that they have value.

Should the proving only be to you?  Now we’re talking, of course it should.  When I think of the long list of things I felt I needed to prove over the course of my life most of them had little to actually do with me.   As a woman was I capable of the same things men were capable of, of course I was and still am. Could I live up to my husband’s family’s expectations, not really.  Did I grab on to that and try to pursue perfection, of course I did.  Could I graduate college (in midlife) in order to advance in my career, of course I could.  Did it?  To a degree.

There is always something to prove to yourself.  At this moment in time I’m trying to prove that I am a creative woman. I’m trying to develop the right side of my brain so that it works on auto pilot, so that it sees things that I’ve always thought it should see.   I’m trying to prove I’m brave, putting myself and my work out there, whether it’s the work I’m paid for or the work that sustains me.

I’m no longer trying to prove I’m perfect. Perfection has always been imposed on me, like keeping the perfect house.  Now, if the bed isn’t made I know like I know the world won’t come to an end.  The people that find themselves on Stowe Lane could care less if I make my bed every day.  Toto especially loves twirling into the sheets whether they are on the bed or not.

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I don’t set the perfect table I just put it all out and people are glad to indulge in the moments I present.  I used to live in that world where you had to worry if you died what would people find in your home?  What were the books that were supposed to be on the night stand, what food should be in the refrigerator, what would be in the fire safe box.  I just bought a fire safe box…by the way.  Among the passport, social security card, deed, the insurance info and will are my Father’s navy manual and bible.  These are the things that are precious, that add value if you will.

I’m not saving the world and my idea of adding value is to show up, to listen, to attempt to stop the spiky haired, skinny jeans bunch from trying to reinvent the wheel all the while staying relevant.  To put out a body of work that someone might find interesting or meaningful.

So what does value really mean:

  • The regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something.
  • The material or monetary worth of something.
  • The intrinsic worth of something.
  • A person’s principles or standards of behavior; one’s judgment of what is important in life.

I got this.  No matter what your definition of value, I can fit into any of it, some of it or all of it. Or none of it.  I love the person I’ve become because I fought hard to become her.  I have proven this to myself, no one else needs to care or approve of this.  It was not who I was that held me back it was who I thought I wasn’t.

For those of you wondering if or how you will provide value, just know like you know that you are and you will.  Not everyone will think so but it only matters that you do.